“Lack of communication can drive a spike between two people wider than any physical distance.” –Mark W Boyer
Couples Therapy and Why It’s Important
Two people meet for the first time. Two people get to know each other. Two people fall in love. Two people get engaged and get married. The moment they begin their life together, inevitable issues will test their resolve from time to time. Couples mustn’t turn a blind eye as these roadblocks appear. Instead, couples must set aside their pride or ego and fish for the help that they need. This ‘help’ is popularly known as Couples Therapy. Couples therapy is widely known as marital therapy, couple counseling, or marriage counseling. It is a specialized type of therapy where romantic partners are the main targets of the intervention.
Partners seeking help via couples therapy are usually advised to choose a therapist with enough training and expertise in this type of intervention. You are free to do a background check on your potential counselor to ascertain whether or not the therapist satisfies your requirements. According to the book “Couples Therapy, Multiple Perspectives: In Search of Universal Threads,” most couples who seek therapy often struggle with issues for several years before they commit to get professional help, with the average being 4-6 years. This reiterates that when a couple finally commits to getting professional service, they may have waited a long time, and there may already be significant damage that might already be too difficult to patch. Successful outcomes from therapy or counseling are usually due to their willingness and commitment to give their significant other a chance. Couples therapy can become challenging where the clients no longer wish to put their time or energy into maintaining the relationship. However, not all stories have sad endings. Couples therapy can still aid partners to correct developing issues if it is initiated early enough.
The importance of couples therapy cannot be over-emphasized. This is especially true if you find out the love between you and your partner is on the rocks at an early stage. There are several reasons why we believe couples therapy can help mend nearly severed relationships, and they include the following;
You get a fascinating perspective of your situation.
The most significant merit of working with a couples counselor is that they can provide you with a fascinating perspective of your situation. While you and your partner are at loggerheads and battling out with your words, they can pay attention to what’s going on. Then, when you’re engulfed by the flames of your disagreements and differences, the therapist can offer a fresh pair of eyes to help you dig out the root of the problem. This is one reason you seek the help of an experienced therapist Typically, a therapist has encountered couples from all walks of life and issues similar to those you’re experiencing. From this experience, they can pull out the necessary tools that will help them objectively observe and try to solve the issues at hand.
And many say there should be sacrifices made in marriage, but what should that really look like?
You get valuable objective advice.
When you and your partner feel disconnected, you are both likely to seek advice from outside parties. You might reach out to your closest friend, parents, or anybody you consider worth talking to. However, your family and friends are more likely to express an element of bias in whatever advice they offer to you. The truth is that your partner does not want to know what your mother thinks about their issues, and certainly, the opposite would be the case as well. Since a therapist knows nothing about you, they are neutral enough to engage in your marital problems actively and give their objective opinion without playing favorites.
You get tips, tools, and methods.
The job of any couples counselor worthy of your investment isn’t just to moderate and facilitate helpful conversation in their presence. They also provide you with tools and tips to use throughout your day. It may be in the form of conversational approaches to help improve your marriage communication or in the form of homework that attempts to help you reconnect in bed. Whatever methods they recommend, these assets should be valued and can continue to be used, even after your last therapy session.
It provides a safe place for you and your partner to air out your withheld emotions.
It is safe enough to say that whatever you and your partner discuss with your therapist in their office space is bound to remain there. It is a place where you can share things freely without being subjected to judgment. The best marriage therapists are those who do not subject you to judgment as a reaction to what you have shared with them, and they provide input when needed. Once you are comfortable with your therapist, you and your partner will be able to air out your feelings and speak freely without having to hold back anything. Where there is open communication, you will be able to kick-start the engine that will help repair the damage in your relationship.
Couples therapy can help you learn acceptance and forgiveness and give you a deeper understanding of yourself and your partner. It can also help you create a supportive environment where you and your partner can learn not to avoid your issues with apathy and isolation, which ultimately can result in unwanted resentment.
Don’t forget, you both committed to life in marriage for couples who have tied the knot. It’s important to try to recall those heartfelt vows you made to one another? “For better, for worse … until death do us part?” If you are beginning to feel like your relationship or marriage is slowly falling apart, you owe it to yourself and your spouse to try and mend the strain in your relationship as quickly as possible by visiting a couples therapist. These therapists are there to help you figure things out and not judge or rebuke you for the mistakes that have provoked your current situation. There is no reason to feel bad about acknowledging your mistakes and trying to repair the damage it has caused. If your relationship is falling apart on the canvas, find a therapist near you to help repaint the beautiful picture that is the love you share with your partner.
Consult with an online – on-demand therapist if you’d like to with BetterHelp.com
Author Bio: Raji Oluwaniyi is a freelance writer who has successfully helped several organizations to pen down articles covering a wide range of topics. He is a hard worker and strives to produce his best every time he is assigned a task.
